A Bad Day Doesn’t Equal a Bad Life
In the beginning, life was nothing but bad days. I couldn’t remember what a good day felt like. A couple of years in, as I started regaining some control over my body, thanks to all sorts of radical self-care practices and a great care team, I remember having a glimpse of a good day. I immediately got my hopes up, expecting that one partially good day was the beginning of my return to “normal.” The next day, I was devastated when I realized that the good day was an anomaly and that I was right back in the downward cycle. I was so depressed and anxious and sad.
Over time, I began to realize that we all get to choose how we live our lives… I get to choose. I can choose to wake up every day and focus on how much pain I’m in, on how miserable I am, on how dizzy I am, on how much I’ve lost, on how much life sucks and isn’t fair, on how much I’ve had to give up, or on how much I can’t do. (Don’t get me wrong… I lived in this place for a long time!
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Or…I can choose to wake up and focus on feeling grateful for everything I do have.
I can choose to remember that vertigo rarely keeps me in bed all day now and that I have medications that help relieve the worst of its effects. I can choose to realize that I walk outside (mostly) every day without needing someone with me, just in case. It doesn’t matter that I pace up and down two streets… I’m outside in my neighborhood instead of inside staring at the same four walls. I can choose to feel incredible gratitude for the team of people that surrounds and supports and helps me. From rides; to cooking meals; to shopping, shoveling, plowing, mowing, etc… I have people. I created the support system that surrounds and holds me and I reciprocate however and whenever I’m able. I can choose to work on my emotional and spiritual health and develop healthy, positive routines that support my physical healing.
I choose to figure out how to be a positive force in the world. I choose to get out of bed every day and accomplish one thing. I choose to not let the bad days take over. I choose not to wallow in all that I’ve lost, had to give up, and had to let go. I choose to live my best life… and to shift my version of “best” to meet myself where I am. I choose!
Every one of us has the capacity to make these choices. We can choose to nurture that little light inside us — that spark that keeps us moving forward. Gratitude is the key. When we feel gratitude — down to our bones — we can live with joy… even (especially!) on the bad days.
